I thought you cared
by Ailin-'O
Summary: Draco's birthday's in two weeks and his father has been... trying to convince him to take the dark mark. One night, the young malfoy goes to Snape... rated Kplus : some blood, selfmutilation... the usual


**Title :** Thought you cared…

**Base :** Harry potter

**Rating :** you could see this as slash or just as gen… up to you.

**Warning :** a little blood, but no, don't accuse Poor Severus, he didn't bleed anyone !

**Summary :** Draco's seventeenth birthday's in two weeks but he doesn't want to do what his father wants and goes to ask for Severus's help. But nothing goes as he planned and he realises his father was right… or was he?

**I Thought You Cared**

Growling softly, Snape ran a hand on his face and dropped his quill…

He'd spent the last two hours correcting Hufflepuffs essays on forbidden potions.

And so far, the only one he had had the strength to read to the end was Finch-Fletchley's.

Well, he had to admit that the boy did pretty well in potions, and that, no matter where he came from. All muggle-borns couldn't be as bad as Granger after all…

But Finch-Fletchley knew a little too much about those forbidden potions for his liking…

He wouldn't have been surprised if it had been Draco's essay.

But Draco was another matter entirely.

So he had had to take points from Hufflepuff, because he suspected Finch-Fletchley of wandering too far in the restricted area of the library.

As for Draco, well… He would have a talk with the boy and try to figure out what his father had put him too on his last vacations.

He was about to resume his grading when a soft knock made him look up from his work.

"What is it?" he asked with a frown

"I… just…" someone hesitated on the other side of the door. Then, more firmly, the voice added "Just me, sir"

Of course, the potion master reconized Draco's voice instantly and waved at the door with his wand.

Before the door could open itself, Draco pushed it the rest of the way and stepped in, looking nervous and confused. The young slitherin closed the door behind him and walked up to the desk.

"Well, it's quite late, mister Malfoy. I hope you have a good reason for disturbing me." Snape said with a glare. He really didn't like being interrupted while he graded copies, no matter how lame they were or how well he liked Lucius' son.

"I'm afraid so, sir…" Draco gulped, fumbling with his robes. "I… Father… it's…"

Raising an eyebrow, Severus studied the boy. He was even paler than usual and his hands were shaking in the dark fabric of his robes. Worst of all, his eyes were cast to the floor and he was silent.

This all was… very uncharacteristic, Snape decided. This couldn't be good.

"Well, speak Malfoy." He pushed.

"It's my birthday in… two weeks." Draco said darkly.

Snape didn't understand at first. But when the blond looked up, there was fear in his eyes and it hit him…

Draco was supposed to take the Mark on his fifteenth birthday.

"I see…" Snape said simply, his eyes on the opposite wall, behind Draco.

"I can't" the blond moaned, running a hand through his silky blond hair."I just… can't"

Suddenly very tired, the head of slitherin stood up with a sigh and crossed the room to stare at the bookshelves.

"Then don't."

"What?"

"You heard me, Malfoy. Your father can't force you, you have to be willing to take the Dark Mark."

"I know…" Draco said, even more confused.

"Then why did you come to me ?" Snape asked, turning around to glare at him.

A flash a pain settled in Draco's eyes as he forced himself to return his potion master's stare.

"I thought…"

"Oh please, Draco!" the older man said dramatically " You _don't_ think, ever… you just _don't_. You let other decide for you all the time, be it your father or me. Now, you know that what your father is asking of you is just too much for you to take and you came here so I could take over and tell you what to do. I won't Draco. Get over it and go back to your dorm…"

For some minutes, silence stretched and Snape turned back to his bookshelves. But he didn't hear Malfoy leave; he didn't hear him at all in fact. Not at first…

But then, there was this strange, sniffling sound and Snape turned around to see Draco pulling at his hair, eyes tightly shut, his face pale and tear-strained.

"I thought you cared…" he heard him groan. "thought you cared…"

Startled, the potion master kept staring at him for some time before reacting. He didn't exactly know what to do, nor did he know why Draco was reacting like this. Surely, it wasn't the first time someone was a little harsh with him. So why was he so fucking upset.

"I thought you cared" the blond repeated "so stupid… stupidstupidstupidstupid"

And with those last words, Draco started pulling harder, biting his lower lip so hard Snape could see a trickle of blood rolling down his chin.

"I'm so fucking stupid" he groaned "always… always… trust… and get… thrown out… pushed away… alone… always"

"Stop, Draco…" Snape ordered, taking a few careful steps towards the younger wizard.

"Whywhywhywhywhy? Fuck… had to… had to fall for it again… had to trust and to… and to… yargh" The blond cried out as he smashed his fist hard into his thigh and clawing at the side of his face 'till blood started straining his cheek and some strands of his hair.

"For Merlin's sake, Draco, stop right now!" Severus snapped, seizing the young man by his shoulders and shaking him "snap out of it, Draco!"

But Draco didn't. He just kept muttering to himself as Snape shook him, clawing at his face and pulling at his hair until he was completely bloodied. Blood started running down his face and smeared his shirt.

And when he looked up at his potion master, Draco had this mad glint in his eyes.

"Should have listened to him… told me you wouldn't care… but I didn't want to believe him… 'cause I thought you did… the way you talked to me…"

Truly worried now, slightly panicky, Snape jerked Draco's hands away from his face.

"Finite Incantum" he groaned, hoping against all hope that this all was a sick joke from Lucius, that Draco wasn't really as mad as he looked right now, but nothing happened and the young man kept muttering, going on and on and on about how "he" didn't care and how Draco told his father to go fuck himself for him… About how much he was willing to do to make him care.

"You're insane, Draco" he stated, releasing the other's wrists. "Merlin… what did he do to you?"

"Cruciatus…Two round… two round before I started crying, two more before… I started… screaming… one more before… I fell to the floor and… one more and..."

At this, Draco winced and took his face in his hand before he fell to his knees on the floor.

Stunned, Severus watched as his best student began sobbing out loud, pressing his hands to his temples, as if trying to push memories out of his head.

A few more seconds before he finally dropped to his knees and pulled the devastated young man into his arms.

"Merlin, Draco…" he whispered, his chest tight around his heart, suffocating him. "I'm sorry… Merlin, I… oh Draco"

But it was too late for apologies, too late to help the boy, too late to do anything but hold him as he cried and screamed, punching him in the chest, spreading blood all over his dark robes.

"Your fault, your fault!… you left me, you let him do this to me!… you let him, you did this to me, you did!"

Feeling sick with guilt, Severus pulled Draco closer and wrapped his arms tighter around his lean, trembling form.

As tears formed in his dark eyes, Snape started rocking the boy against him and finally, after what felt like eternity, the poor thing calmed down, his hands still gripping at the back of his teacher's robes but not really shaking anymore.

"Don't leave me… don't let him get me… he's going to come… he'll never let me… I see him at night… every night he's here, in my head… please, tell him off… I want him gone…"

"It's okay Draco, he won't hurt you… ever again… I won't let him near you…"

"Please…"

Silence fell again and, after some more rocking, Snape looked down at Draco and caught him staring back at him.

"You won't leave me"

Brushing a strand of hair out of Draco's face, Snape slowly shook his head.

"I knew you cared… I knew…" Draco muttered, an innocent smile on his bloodied lips. "need you to…"

More silence followed before Snape carefully stood up and carried Draco in his arms to his bed.

"Nice…" Malfoy commented, feeling the sheets "very nice…"

"Try to sleep, Draco."

"Stay with me ?"

Not really knowing what to answer to that, Severus frowned at the blond boy, sprawled on his bed. Draco's face was all smeared with blood and his hair was dishevelled. Snape couldn't really believe what had just happened. He felt so bad for the boy, for letting him down…

"Please" Draco insisted.

And Severus nodded, walking around the bed and sitting on the other side. He quickly threw his boots away and rearranged the pillows under Draco's head before laying down himself.

As soon as he was on his back, Draco rolled on the side and snuggled against his chest, throwing a lean arm over the older wizard's chest and hiding his face in his neck.

"Draco…"

A few minutes passed before he dared to look down at the sleeping boy wrapped over his side. Draco was quiet now, he looked safe and peaceful.

Snape softly cast a cleaning spell on the boy and waved his hand at the light to extinguish it before wrapping both his arms around Draco.

He would report to Dumbledore in the morning. Tell him that Draco turned his father's offer to join the death-eaters down and that he would remain at Hogwarts and stay over at his house when summer came. He would tend to Draco's wound and mend for new mistakes.

"love you…" a small voice mumbled, muffle by the skin of his neck.

"Sleep, Draco, sleep… everything is gonna be alright now…"

The end !


End file.
